Month: August 2022

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Failure to adequately address anxiety in young children may exacerbate separation anxiety

August 2022

Written by: New Horizons Development Centre, Certified Educational Psychologist Pang Chi Wah

 

As the school year begins again, many children cry when they first go to kindergarten. However, there are also children who can go to school without any adjustment period because their parents can prepare them mentally and practice simulations. For children, entering kindergarten may be their first major challenge because some children are separated from their families for the first time when they enter kindergarten, but once they have enough time to become familiar with the school environment, they will feel safe in kindergarten life and will not cry.

 

What bothers parents and teachers the most is that after a few weeks of enrollment, children continue to cry or expressly resist going back to school. In better cases, they may not like to participate in extracurricular activities, and in more severe cases, they may refuse to go to school, and in some extreme cases, they may not allow their parents to leave their sight. These are all separation anxiety problems.

In fact, there may be deeper reasons why children do not adapt to being separated from their families that need to be understood in depth. For example, some children are admitted to the intensive care unit when they are newborn because they are underweight or have physical problems, or they need to be hospitalized or undergo surgery because they are sick. Although such medical support is necessary for them, it may also lead to traumatic psychological experiences for them, and since then they may be afraid of strangers or unfamiliar places and easily develop separation anxiety, and their sense of security is lower than other children.

 

In some even worse cases, parents are not allowed to work, or that the child needs to be left with a babysitter, but the children do not want to be left behind, so the parents consider the reality of their needs and have to forcibly separate from them or lie to them. As a result of parents’ misuse of inappropriate methods, their feelings of insecurity during infancy and early childhood are reinforced. The so-called traumatic experiences are actually events that cause them to be psychologically afraid.

The main reason for the lack of security in young children is the separation from their families and the failure of parents to handle the situation properly. Ironically, some caregivers do not provide a safe and adequate living environment in their daily lives, and more importantly, there are frequent changes in caregivers or places, and there are strong contrasts in caregiving practices, causing them to go through psychological adjustment tests before they start school.

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Parents Daily 為全港父母提供關於親子育兒、升學的豐富短片和內容，專輯內容包括「有星有Say」、「校長有話兒」等節目。我們以輕鬆活潑的方式為父母們提供培養孩子的資訊，更會邀請幼小校長、名人、資深教育工作者等分享教學、親子心得和實戰經驗，讓父母可以在這裡得到實用資訊之餘，更可認識更多互相分享、互相扶持的同行者。

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Educating your child is for primary school? Parent-child education is more important

August 2022

Written by:  Octopus parent, Mr. Leung Wing Lok

 

I remember when my eldest son, Hay, was in K1, I wrote, “Son, are you happy to start school? I ask my child “Are you happy?” one school year later. I don’t have to consider answer. My wife and I are very happy and thankful for the love and effort of the kindergarten, and Hay is very happy every day and is eager to go to school every day (especially to meet the teachers). Someone reminded me, “I’ll ask you again when you’re ready to apply for Primary One, are you happy? It’s just like a tray of cold water pouring on me.

 

Entering elementary school becomes the biggest shadow for parents?

 

I have heard many parents tell me that the biggest shadow in the three years of kindergarten is the promotion to primary school, how much do I have to do for my child? Should we arrange for interview classes? Should we take remedial classes in English or manners (no mistake, there are really training classes in the market to take remedial classes in manners)? Or is it enough to have 16 out of 18 arts? Or should we learn a cold skill to stand out from the crowd? For example, learning magic or acrobatics. Both parents and children are busy remembering to enjoy happy parent-child time, especially when all activities have a purpose, the mentality changes accordingly, and children may no longer be interested in interest classes.

Parents are worried about choosing their favorite elementary schools and making a resume

 

Especially when K3 students enter the “school enrollment season” in June, parents and children are faced with the choice of enrolling in 10 or 8 elementary schools. As a father, you would like to enroll in only one or two elementary schools of your choice, but will you be able to bear the responsibility of “no school for your son”?

 

Another problem is to make a resume, how beautiful does it have to be? Many schools say they will only accept a maximum of four pages, but I have seen other parents writing “work reports” for their children that are as thick as prospectuses and as beautiful as the Apple computer’s profile book. If you look at your child, you don’t see that he is particularly awake, nor is he a super “pretty boy”, are you brave enough to make a 4-page resume?

The choice between “promotion to primary school” and “being a human being”.

 

To sum up what Hay has learned in kindergarten over the past year. The most precious thing is not how good the “academic performance” is, but learning to get along with others and being polite. Of course, I am most grateful for the teacher’s special instruction to Hay to “love Daddy and work hard”, so that I can change from “someone I don’t see all the time” to “someone I cherish seeing” in my child’s mind. This kind of education may not be helpful for the promotion to primary school, but it is a value that is cherished between parents and children for a lifetime

 

Think about it, does kindergarten specialize in nurturing your child to “go on to primary school” or to “be a human being”? Similarly, as a parent, do you educate your child only for the purpose of “moving up to primary school”?

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Parents Daily 為全港父母提供關於親子育兒、升學的豐富短片和內容，專輯內容包括「有星有Say」、「校長有話兒」等節目。我們以輕鬆活潑的方式為父母們提供培養孩子的資訊，更會邀請幼小校長、名人、資深教育工作者等分享教學、親子心得和實戰經驗，讓父母可以在這裡得到實用資訊之餘，更可認識更多互相分享、互相扶持的同行者。

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Is it really necessary to establish the authority of the father?

August 2022

Written by: Mr. Leung Wing Lok, an octopus parent

 

Since I got a Kim Jong-un haircut by a hair stylist, I have been thinking about whether I should implement “Kim Jong-un style of discipline” at home to a pair of children, and to authoritatively promote my personal hero worship to my father, so as to regain my status and authority in the family, and to implement the “Great Father Leader”, and I am planning to hang my own magnificent pictures in all rooms and play the “Love Daddy” song, but unfortunately, it has been a failure before implementation. ……

 

Should you build authority in your children from a young age?

 

Many of my friends would remind me to build authority while my children are still young, otherwise we will not be respected when they grow up. The friends’ good intentions are based on how they were “taught” or “lectured” when they were young, and then they “respected” and “feared” their fathers, and had a good relationship with their fathers when they grew up, so they concluded that “filial children come out from under the rod” and “don’t be disobedient”.

A friend shared his personal story of being beaten “because he was beaten every day, both big and small, he was already used to it”, and one night he felt strange because he had not been “taught a lesson”, and before he went to bed, he did not forget to remind his parents “to beat or not to beat? If not, I will go to sleep ……” is full of black humor. But fortunately, my friend is a kind-hearted person who grew up without a vengeance and did not become a murderer.

 

Dismantling the true power of fatherhood

 

The question of how to establish the authority of a father is a perennial problem, and I ask “Why must we establish patriarchal authority? Is the purpose to facilitate management? A command was given and all the children obeyed. Or how much of it is to satisfy one’s own desire for power, “I am the father, you are the children, you must listen to what I say. Or even more, “I say one is one, and my children have no right to say two. I believe that if I were such an “authoritarian” father, I would not be happy either, because my father is not so domineering, and has never “dictated” my decisions on further education, employment, etc., except for when I scored near zero in exams and dictations when I was young, I would be given a harsh “What are you doing? I think this is the power of patriarchal authority.

Teaching by example is more important than discipline

 

Back to my “Kim Jong-un discipline”, my eldest son, Hay, is always angry because of changing clothes, and the conversation often goes like this, my wife or I: “Change your clothes! We’re going out! “I kept doing my best to show my fatherly authority (pretending) and said angrily, “Go change your shirt, go, go, go! He was so disturbed but did not do anything. My wife couldn’t resist: “You haven’t changed your shirt yet? Is there anything wrong! Hay replied, “Daddy won’t help me change my shirt! I said: “I’d help you change, but you didn’t. Come on over” He is furious: “I want to change myself “Normally I will be so angry but before the fake role became a real anger, Hay came to me and hugged me and said “Today is Father’s Day, Happy Father’s Day! I feel a sense of déjà vu…. Teaching by example is more important than discipline, and “Kim Jong-un’s discipline” is even less necessary and is automatically set aside.

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Parents Daily 為全港父母提供關於親子育兒、升學的豐富短片和內容，專輯內容包括「有星有Say」、「校長有話兒」等節目。我們以輕鬆活潑的方式為父母們提供培養孩子的資訊，更會邀請幼小校長、名人、資深教育工作者等分享教學、親子心得和實戰經驗，讓父母可以在這裡得到實用資訊之餘，更可認識更多互相分享、互相扶持的同行者。

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Only want to stay in the air-conditioned condition during hot weather? Beware of get air conditioning disease？

August 2022

Written by: Yeung Ming Ha, Registered Chinese Medicine Practitioners

 

This summer is really “hot and heavy”! In the face of the alarmingly high temperatures, families always want to stay in air-conditioned rooms. In addition to the increase in cases of heat stroke, many patients have “cold” symptoms, suffering from air-conditioning disease. Because the hotter the weather, the more likely to covet air conditioning, when out of the air-conditioned room, equivalent to a seasonal temperature difference, in this “hot and cold” situation, it is prone to catch a cold.

 

The most suitable temperature for the human body is 24.5 degrees to 25.5 degrees, but many office central air conditioning is often set at between 15 ℃ and 20 ℃. When working staff have to sit in the office for 8 hours a day, students stay in the classroom for a long time, they will suffer from “air-conditioning sickness” when they are exposed to low temperature for a long time. The symptoms include headache, dizziness, easy fatigue, nasal allergy and runny nose.

Moreover, prolonged exposure of the respiratory tract to dry and cold air causes continuous loss of mucosal moisture, and cold air causes microvascular constriction of the mucosa and reduced glandular secretion, resulting in a drier respiratory mucosa. Not only does it produce a dry and itchy throat, but it also aggravates nasal allergy. The following are some of the my tips for effective prevention of cold weather illness.

 

  1. Keep warm to avoid pain

If the air conditioning vent is facing the head, it will stimulate the head. The head is the meeting of all the yang, cold condensation will make the flow of qi and blood blocked, “blocked then pain”, resulting in headache. Even worse is the direct blowing of air conditioning, causing many chronic pains, such as arthritis, knee pain and lumbago, etc., which are then aggravated. The easiest way to keep warm is to avoid being blown directly by the air conditioning and to wear more warm clothes. Before entering an air-conditioned place, you can rub your hands together to warm them up and then cover your nose to avoid the cold air from entering the nasal cavity directly, which will stimulate the nasal mucosa and induce nasal allergy. In addition, you should wear a shawl or a thin jacket to avoid head and neck pains caused by air conditioning.

 

  1. Health tea treatment for air-conditioning diseases

 

People often eat snacks in the afternoon to refresh themselves. It’s suggested eating more foods such as red dates, brown sugar, peel and ginger water, these foods not only do not cause fat, but also promote blood circulation. If you are not suffering from allergic rhinitis and want to relieve dryness in the respiratory tract, you should drink more plain water or honey water on weekdays. You can also drink a tablespoon of brown sugar and three slices of ginger in hot water for 20 to 30 minutes. You can also eat fruits that are more nourishing, such as pears, because they nourish the lungs and stomach, quench thirst and nourish the skin.

For those who suffer from allergic rhinitis, this tea can be used to relieve air conditioning.

Ingredients: 3 grams of Chinese ears, 12 grams of catkins, 6 grams of peppermint and 9 grams of almonds for tea therapy.

Directions

Step 1: Put the ingredients into a tea bag, add warm water at 90 degrees, and bake for 15 minutes.

Step 2: Diffuse the nose with steam for about 1 minute, because the essence in it contains the volatile oil of peppermint, which has the effect of clearing nasal congestion. After the drink is warmed up, it can be consumed.

 

Efficacy: Peppermint, Cang Er Zi and Catkins are all in the lung meridian and have the effect of dispelling wind and clearing the nasal orifices. Almond has the function of keeping the lungs smooth and moistening them. The combination of these herbs can effectively reduce the symptoms of nasal allergy.

 

  1. Often patting the acupuncture points to stimulate blood circulation

On weekdays, you can use your fingers to press or pat the Yongquan point on the bottom of your feet, which is also known as the “longevity point” and can stimulate blood circulation throughout the body, making your body warm and relaxing to sleep. In addition, the navel and three inches below the location are some points to strengthen the body and Qi, such as Qihai and Guan Yuan. In addition, warm water bags to warm the abdomen, also has the effect of cold to prevent disease. And often to sit in the air-conditioned room, try not to maintain the same sitting posture for a long time, usually may wish to do some simple stretching movements, so that blood circulation, so that the body naturally warmed up.

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Parents Daily 為全港父母提供關於親子育兒、升學的豐富短片和內容，專輯內容包括「有星有Say」、「校長有話兒」等節目。我們以輕鬆活潑的方式為父母們提供培養孩子的資訊，更會邀請幼小校長、名人、資深教育工作者等分享教學、親子心得和實戰經驗，讓父母可以在這裡得到實用資訊之餘，更可認識更多互相分享、互相扶持的同行者。

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