Written by: Principal Cheung Jok Fong, Education expert
Have you ever heard the theme song “Embrace Love” from a certain TV series? I really like some of the lyrics, which simply yet powerfully convey the essence of “home”: home is a place that “shelters from wind and rain”, your “shield” that will always “open its door” when you are “weary”. The “love” mentioned refers to the familial love that is destined from the moment you were born – a bond thicker than water. Indeed, what could be more important than family love? When you are down on your luck, your family will share your worries, listen to your woes, and accompany you through the difficult times; when you are ill, your family will care for you unconditionally; when you succeed in your studies or career, they will rejoice wholeheartedly and feel proud of your accomplishments. This kind of “love” is something that money cannot buy.
This year, our school has chosen “family” as the main theme, hoping to help parents and students appreciate the preciousness of family love. Unfortunately, this love may be taken for granted, as we are born into it, and hence some people fail to cherish it. Sometimes, we see from the news that some youths would rather loiter on the streets than return home; some families are embroiled in constant bickering, turning home into a battleground; some people even resort to violence against their own family members over trivial matters, leading to bloodshed. These are just the tip of the iceberg – it is truly saddening to see a good home deteriorate in such a way.
Three Phrases to Say More Often at Home
How can we build a harmonious family? Pope Francis, when discussing family life, proposed the “three family phrases”, which are the three phrases we should say more often at home: “thank you”, “may I”, and “I’m sorry”. “Thank you” expresses gratitude to family members. Often, children take the care provided by their parents for granted. But think about it – do parents have to prepare three meals a day for you? Who washes your clothes and shoes, giving you a more hygienic living environment? When you are sick, who tenderly cares for you, even getting up at night to feed you medicine? Schoolmates, while your parents are caring for you, why not say “thank you” more often? When you have the chance, you can also help your parents with household chores, sharing their workload. In fact, when children help with household tasks, parents can also say “thank you” to them. Nowadays, it is no longer appropriate for elders to adopt a superior attitude. Everyone has a responsibility in building a harmonious family – do not assume that certain tasks are the sole responsibility of certain family members. Even when receiving help from family members, a simple “thank you” can go a long way.
“Please” represents respect for
family members and polite behavior towards others. Some may think that since
they are family, they do not need to be too polite and can just speak directly.
However, “please” not only reminds us to speak politely, but also to
consider the feelings of our family members. Sometimes, people get into heated
arguments over trivial matters, believing that they should fight for what is
right, even with their own family. But is that really worth it? As the saying
goes, “You may have won the battle, but lost the family.” Even with
family, it is still better to be more cautious with our words.
As for “I’m sorry,” it represents
seeking forgiveness from family members. When we have done something wrong, we
should have the courage to take responsibility and say “I’m sorry” to
those we have hurt. At the same time, “I’m sorry” also represents an
opportunity to mend relationships with our family. Sometimes, it is not easy to
determine who is right or wrong, or there may not even be a clear right or
wrong, but just differences in values. Many conflicts arise from this very
reason. If everyone refuses to compromise, the relationship will become very
strained. As the saying goes, “Take a step back, and the world will be
wide open.” Letting go of one’s ego does not mean one has to surrender or
compromise on the issue, but rather creates a new opportunity to solve the
problem in a better way.
Both in China and abroad, the concept of
“family” is highly valued. God said, “It is not good for the man
to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18) God
has arranged for us to grow up in different groups, and the first group is our
family. As for Confucius, he greatly valued filial piety, believing it to be
the foundation of being a good person and a scholar. Let us all start
practicing the “Three Phrases of Family Life” from today, and build a
harmonious and beautiful family together.