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Written by: Senior Early Childhood Education Consultant, Miss Mok Loi Yan
In recent years, news of parent-child tragedies has become increasingly common. The root cause lies in severe deviations in parent-child relationships, familial bonds, and individual roles in family responsibilities. This results in resentment, blame-shifting, and an inability to combat negative thoughts, sometimes leading to the desire to harm others as a form of self-relief.
Guiding Children on the Right Path Through Parental Values
Although parents may feel heartbroken, they cannot turn back time to rebuild affectionate relationships with their children or restore the value of familial bonds. People do not have the choice to select their parents, so they must cherish the relationships they have. However, parents can seize the present moment to let their children know that they are the most selfless people in the world, allowing them to feel the warmth and tenderness of their parents. Since we never know when we might no longer be by our children’s side, the only things that can help them make judgments, prevent them from going astray, and resist negative temptations are the values and parent-child relationships taught by their parents. Children must understand that regardless of whether family life is smooth or challenging, it is a gift and a form of training. Through this training, people become stronger, making it an invaluable element of growth.
When we witness the tragedies of other families and individuals, it serves as a warning to resolutely avoid following the same path. At the same time, parents should realize that when they pass away, the only things they leave behind for their descendants are a lifetime of wisdom, culture, and the character they have instilled in their children. At this moment, what do parents expect from their children? I hope: “Just be a good person.” Storytelling education is a way to impart important values to children, facilitate communication, and build parent-child relationships.
The
value of familial affection lies in accumulating intimacy from a young age.
Parents must strive to build
intimacy with their children from an early age. The following example
demonstrates how a mother can meet her child’s need for security, highlighting
the importance of building intimacy and empathy:
One day, a 2-year-old baby suddenly
raised their hands and stood on tiptoe, seemingly craving adult affection. We
often refer to this behavior as “acting spoiled.” However, the father
said, “Hold the baby? Okay, stand properly for Daddy to see first.”
At this moment, the baby turned to the mother, raised their hands again, and
stood on tiptoe, showing a strong desire for care. The mother immediately
embraced the baby and said touching and selfless words to the father: “Ah,
the love of Mommy and Daddy is not something the baby needs to beg for; love is
always there, and we don’t have many days to be this close. Let the baby feel
our love.” This story allows everyone to savor the value, role, and
response of being a parent.
Additionally, I have several tips
for promoting parent-child relationships and story education to share:
1.
Let your children understand your values, viewpoints, and response
methods through your actions.
2.
Do not make your children fear your calls or feel annoyed,
including only testing or completing tasks you assign.
3.
Parental instruction methods should only be used in situations
that endanger health or life; otherwise, just warn of the consequences and
respond calmly to the child’s anger and pain after they face the consequences.
4.
When children proactively share things, encourage them to express
their viewpoints, hypothesize by taking on another role, and analyze emotions
and thoughts to increase empathy.
5.
Create more opportunities for shared learning and topics, allowing
you and your children to have similar feelings and experiences.
6.
If a child’s response in a story shows a deviation in values, such
as tendencies toward violence or revenge, express that this makes you sad and
guide the child to think of reasonable solutions or the benefits of letting go
of the issue.
In summary, everyone has emotional
and psychological needs for satisfaction. To help children grow in a balanced
way emotionally and cognitively, parents must cultivate themselves to manage
their families. Parents need to have the ability to judge and understand the
entire value of their child’s life: happiness and contribution. Only then can
children inherit and spread the mission of love through your example and
teachings.
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